Sunday, October 2, 2016

The Wall against Reason


GC had heard it said that perception was not reality. Our perception of a flower differed from that of the bumble bee.

T said that she remembered the exercise because it was she who had set it. As usual for her it was uppermost in the first week or two. Then it went away from her awareness and came back intermittently. It changed her awareness momentarily. It was a trigger to come back into her body - she was usually very observant of everything around her rather than feeling and being in her body.

EXERCISE

 When walking along, be aware of your stomach and pull it in. Be aware of what that does to other organs, particularly the lungs. Be aware of the change in the breathing.

RM said he was becoming more aware of the difference between consciousness and awareness. When he was absolutely present in a state of awareness, synchronicities happened as if nature was completely connected with him. This was a state of awareness not a state of consciousness.


Identifying location of pain
"R" had been trying to find moments when she was reminded to say inwardly "I am", and that reinforced the impression of presence, and, for her, having some more whole attention for her. She had some back pain and one day in particular she tried to notice what was hurting and where, and she found that during the day there were at different times, completely different places that were hurting. The only remedy to avoid feeling the pain was to be obsessed with something. There were plenty of things to be obsessed with, appointments and so on, but also to find in the middle of that, "I am", a sense of presence in her head, her spine, and the feelings, and how often she had completely forgotten.

C also used the "I am" technique. as described by Gurdjieff. Along with that he also tried to be present with every footfall as he was walking. He had a strange experience while doing something very menial. While speaking to his cats after feeding them, he had the strong feeling that he was not really there, and being aware that he was not there. It was as if he was not taking part in reality and was in a world of his own.

N had used standing up as the trigger. As with T, the first week was good. Then life took over and he forgot the exercise more. Like RM, he thought he noticed synchronicities more as he became more conscious.

L had done the exercise, especially when walking, and remembered it a few times a day. It made him feel differently, including a little bit taller, which was all to the good. On other things, the previous day he had had a concert performance, and although it went very, very well, he was amazed that there was still resistance to his music from the conductor who found it old-fashioned, and he realised that the resistance to his music was very important to him as a composer, because if you keep overcoming resistance it was a pointer where to go. People liked what they were familiar with. There had been coincidences too. Recently he had taken a map of Gurdjieff's travels. The framer looked at it and said he used to be very interested in Gurdjieff. Also at the concert there had been a piece of music about the refugees coming into the country, and their plight. After the concert, a refugee arrived at the venue and appealed for help. Generally these synchronicities were the sort of thing that happened in dreams.

RG said it was very easy to forget, because we were always distracted by other things. This was a good reminder always to switch and think who we were.

AG had a concept of himself from what his senses reported to him. What he felt was in reality only an electric impulse that connected with the brain. His question was, was what he really felt and perceived what other people also could see?

D responded to RM's contribution, that he had experienced the feeling of being present, but for him it did not last and became replaced with boredom. He thought boredom might be a very spiritual state, but found it very difficult, feeling the need to fill it with some activity. C said it was important to keep trying when the feeling of being present waned. L said that what D had described sounded more like the French concept of ennui, and read out a dictionary definition: A feeling of listlessness and dissatisfaction arising from a lack of occupation or excitement. "R" said that the practical things to struggle with when bored were impatience and laziness.

The Meeting continued with the Reading from Beelzebub's Tales, Chapter 22.

 
With acknowledgments to Harold Good
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... We traveled under these conditions more than a month of their time, and finally we came upon a small settlement of the three-brained beings who, as it appeared later, had only recently migrated there from Pearl-land.

As we afterwards learned, this settlement was called ’Sincratorza’; and when this region was subsequently populated and this same place became the principal center for all the beings of that region, the whole country also came to be called by the same name.

The name of this place was afterwards changed several times and now it is called ‘Tibet.’

T wondered if the word Sincratorza had significance. GC said he had heard that synchronicity is the external form of intuition. He said it happened more to him in India, and when he was not "present". L said the place would be added to the map.

The particular strangeness of this peculiarity of theirs consists in this, that those who belong to any such sect never call themselves ‘sectarians,’ the name being considered offensive; they are named ‘sectarians’ only by those beings who do not belong to their sect.

... These sectarians who called themselves the Self-tamers arose owing to that distorted understanding of the Buddhist religion which, as I have already told you, they called ‘suffering-in-solitude.’

D queried what the suffering-in-solitude was. T said it might mean monks in cells. GC thought this a stupid approach. "R" said the suffering was taken on intentionally, and that this approach was not the "fourth way", but one of the earlier three, the way of the monk. T said that the fact humans were born with the inevitability of death was suffering in itself. GC said that this universe had been in existence for fourteen billion years. We were here for three score years and ten. It was ridiculous to worry about dying.

... At first, while they were settling down in this new place, they more or less agreed among themselves; but when they began carrying out in practice the special form of ‘suffering’ they had invented, their families and especially their wives, having learned what this special form of suffering consisted in, rebelled, and made a great outcry about it, with the result that a schism occurred.

RG asked why we should have to go to the extreme of such suffering. GC said it was a choice. RG said we could choose something else. L agreed that there was no need to suffer.

... But when, as I have already said, they, having settled down, set about carrying out in practice the special form of ‘suffering’ which they had invented, and their wives, having learned its true nature, rebelled, then many of them, having fallen under the influence of their wives, declined to carry out the obligations they had undertaken while still in Pearl-land—and as a result, they then divided into two independent parties.

From this time on, these sectarians, formerly called the Self-tamers, now began to be called by various names; those of the Self-tamers who remained faithful to the obligations they had taken upon themselves were called ‘Orthodoxhydooraki,’ while the rest, who had renounced the several obligations they had undertaken in their native country, were called ‘Katoshkihydooraki.’

The current Ecumenical Patriarch, Bartholomew I.
D asked what Katoshkihydooraki was. RM said it sounded like a dance to him. T said there was ki in it which sounded like 'key' or 'chi', and there was door in it, so she did not know if that had any relevance. "R" thought the second part of each word, hydooraki, had the word hierarchy in it. D noted orthodox was part of the earlier word Orthodoxhydooraki. L said that Gurdjieff, as a young man, came across Greek Orthodox priests. Otherwise why would he use the word orthodox? L thought the Katoshkihydooraki were those who rebelled against orthodoxy. "R" thought the words might relate to Russian roots. N said that this happened even within the Gurdjieff schools, where some consider themselves as the progenitors of the original Gurdjieff work and that others had not really got the message. L said the Gurdjieff organisations had fragmented into many branches, branches within branches. "R" said there were sects using the name that had never had anything to do with it. L said Gurdjieff might be describing what had happened to him as well.

... At that time of the day we usually made a halt to feed our quadruped workers, and so we asked the monks to allow us to make our necessary halt in the shelter of their monastery.

... The monastery of the Orthodoxhydooraki sect of the Buddhist religion occupied a large square with a strongly built wall around it, which protected everything within, both from beings similar to themselves and from wild beings.

L had noticed that Gurdjieff was not distinguishing here between human beings and animals, but was just talking about workers, be they biped or quadruped. C said the sentence about the wall might describe the way something from the outside is preventing us from knowing what we are on the inside. We were building a strong wall around ourselves, which could be various personalities, and it impedes the teaching from penetrating. L said the part of the words describing the sectarians - hydooraki - might be a reference to the monster Hydra. It might be a monstrous wall, or to protect from something monstrous. Also there may be the connotation of hiding. "R" said the wall was partly to keep the wives and families out. C said this seemed wrong. It was an odd way of going about finding out who you were, by subjecting other people to unnecessary pain.

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