BS, in his message from India, spoke of possible symbolism in images of Shiva. The closed eyes stop energy from going out. The crescent moon may represent balance and growth. The Ganges flowing out of his hair may represent new birth. The trident may be about time - past, present and future, with the middle one, representing the present, being the sharpest. On his left, the damru (small drum) may be an instrument of awakening, and the snake a symbol of subtle energy or of facing fear. 
BW has been meditating twice daily, and been experimenting with lucid dreaming, and has succeeded in having two lucid dreams. He has managed to complete a play to a specific deadline. On the other hand he had a simple form to complete in five minutes, but it took him hours to get round to filling it in. He has been reading about enneagram personality types, and recognised himself as type 3, as one who seeks approval from external sources.
D has put his project for extra meetings on hold, as there have been obstacles to the arrangements for venue. There is so much work going on in the flats, replacing radiators - it is going on for weeks, the noise and commotion! He can't write at the moment, and is reducing what he does. He watches TV. Football is a distraction from the neck and back pain that he is experiencing. However today he felt more present, and woke up to come to the Meeting in the rain.
RM appreciated BS's email about Shiva, which he has been thinking about in the context of his reinterpretation of the Bhagavad Gita. He thinks it is about the death and birth of Shiva. It occurred to him that this whole thing about death is that it destroys the past. He thinks Shiva destroys the past, that everything he holds onto must be destroyed before he can move on. By not feeling consumed by the past, the next moment comes alive. "Consuming the past feeds the present". When he works practically with this attitude, e.g. building a motor car or anything, letting everything go in the past, he feels so much alive.
L said he had found the mindfulness exercise useful, and had used an app as suggested the previous month. It had been interesting to give attention to a part of the body using GC's trigger of when one feels uncomfortable with what one is doing. He has also been experiencing a growing congruence between different aspects of his life and work. Our culture separates art from science and he thinks it is possible to approach everything the same way. In more than one aspect of his work he is using Fibonacci ratios and golden rectangles.
Over the past month M has experienced trying to remember himself. There is always a choice to do something or not, always a reason to put something off (i.e. forces to put one to sleep again). If reviewing to-do lists shows that more things are being done, it is like a personal victory to staying awake.
T has observed that applying the technique of cursing the cursers to her own family, as in the story of Karapet of Tiflis, she is cursing her own parents and grandparents. We are all related so by cursing the cursers she is cursing herself. She has adapted the procedure following this realisation.
GC has been advised to try an exercise of becoming aware of his right arm, and finds he can be thus absorbed, but thinks he also needs to be aware of the outside world. There is an issue of how to combine these two types of observation.
"R" recalled that since being small, she has had the intuition that consciousness means being more aware of oneself. She has tried for a long time to be aware of every cell in her body, but always, eventually, stops being awake, and wonders why the state of wakefulness cannot by sustained. She thinks that working with other people with the same aim can help. Like D, she has an aching back which is very uncomfortable; and it is very strange, but when she is dreaming about something, the ache disappears. She thinks that it should be the other way round, that the pain should go when in a state of wakefulness.
The Meeting then considered responses to the initial contributions.
Responding to GC, D said he had to combine both internal and external experience. He thinks his pain is not just a pain, but is to do with what's going on around him. The constant refurbishment of his flat is annoying. He was a victim of authority in childhood, and can become too subjective - he feels he has to get over the obsession with himself. Walking over the Heath, being in nature always helps him. Walking through the concrete jungle, sometimes the song of a robin wakes him up. He has been talking to RM, who goes abroad frequently - the journeys help wake him up. T asked if the workers at his flat were waking him up. She said things happen to stop her working - when she begins her work, external noise will sometimes start at that precise moment, "on the dot". Perhaps the workers are providing a shock. RM said there is no shortage of external shocks, though they might not be noticed - these shocks can give energy.
M returned to the subject of meditation - you should keep in mind how you are and how you would like to be. This gives an indication of how you might improve. Over time, slowly, this type of meditation changes one's life. "R" quoted from the Bhagavad Gita, "No effort is wasted".
RM had been asking, what is a balanced life? At the start of the day, the world is in balance, then the day brings changes. On a recent voyage he had been invited to run a meditation group - this can go inwards (candles and sandals brigade) or outward (also an escape) - when getting a balance he felt a harmony. GC said that when he is experiencing balance, it finishes. He recommended reading the book Inside a Question, and asked BW to read out an excerpt:
I should end with a saying by Mr Gurdjieff: "Only two possibilities are open to Man, either to eat or be eaten by all these things we trust or obey."
GC queried if it is necessary to obey them, he needed vision and asked for comment by "R", who replied that everything in the universe feeds on something else - we in our turn may be working to feed something else; maybe all this agonising is part of the wastage of energy. We can try to get closer to energy that motivates the universe, which may be expressing itself. If we say eat or be eaten, we are speaking of an instinctive understanding to transform courser substances into finer ones. L quoted Dostoevsky, "Beauty will save the world". M said you are eaten with aggravation when things don't go your way. That "going wrong" is your being eaten. Z said that in the extract read out, she had a resistance to the word "obey". She prefers "obedience". Obedience to what you know is right, what effort to make.
D asked if one would know what to do if one were more present. RM said this would be the case. GC provided a counter-example - becoming aware that a backgammon opponent is better doesn't make you better, even if you are in the present. He recommended reading "Gurdjieff for Beginners" and did not agree with the monthly reading from Beelzebub's Tales.
The period for responses completed, the Meeting continued with the reading from Beelzebub's Tales. Beelzebub actually begins his tales to his grandson, talking of the strange beings inhabiting the third planet of the solar system to which he had been exiled:
The external coatings of the three-brained beings of that planet Earth closely resemble our own; only, first of all, their skin is a little slimier than ours, and then, secondly, they have no tail, and their heads are without horns. What is worst about them is their feet, namely, they have no hoofs; it is true that for protection against external influences they have invented what they call 'boots' but this invention does not help them very much.
Apart from the imperfection of their exterior form, their Reason also is quite 'uniquely strange.' ... has gradually degenerated, and at the present time, is very, very strange and exceedingly peculiar.
Before Beelzebub can elaborate, the Captain arrives and a discussion, apparently on developments in spacecraft technology, ensues.
For an exercise until the next meeting, "R" proposed one on the eating theme, what one eats and how one eats - eating on all levels. Reduce it to trying to be present when picking up knife and fork. Self belief and confidence are important, as is having a sense of audience.
