Weeping Tree, Sneezing Flea.

N said that when he shifted his attention, he found that he was still aware of what was going on in the street, but he was also aware of these other things happening as well.

Once a day, when you walk down the street, shift your consciousness to something different that you feel is unimportant, that hasn't grabbed your attention.

It increased the level of his consciousness, and the more he did it the more he found it added to a state of awareness in the course of the day. It was quite a pleasant CHALLENGE to do as well, just to remind himself, and bring himself back into separate reality and not be absorbed totally by things in front of him.

D said that on his way, he became very aware of a weeping willow, with a huge canopy, and he stood under it. He had walked up that road many times, and never noticed it. A bit further on, he saw a huge white mansion, that he had never really noticed. He thought this challenge had calmed him down, and he had not been lost in conditioned thoughts. The colours suddenly bounced into his consciousness. He had suggested this challenge but did not know where he had read it.

When T started it, she thought to herself that it was no different from what she was doing all the time, in a visual sense, being aware, through painting, so she thought that this was not going to impinge on her that much. She had been attempting to do it more consciously, and she found that on two occasions she fell over, because she was more absorbed in the peripheral visions, than she would otherwise be, which had really surprised her. She thought what happened was that she directed attention to the peripherals and then forgot where she was. She had not been looking consciously at the pavement in front of her. The challenge had tripped her up.

"R" said she had been doing a lot of travelling over the previous month, and she found how little attention she usually gave to the scenery that was going past. She tried to use this as a reminder to sense herself, because she had got an opportunity to sense where she was, otherwise it was just another distraction.

L had been prejudiced about this challenge because it was a Gurdjieff Meeting, and he thought everything we did should be about Gurdjieff, but he did try it a few times. He was a person who tried to develop a centre, and look where he was going, but to look for something else, a distraction, was taking him away from his focus and his direction. It was lovely to walk along the street, and then if he was looking too much at one thing, to look at something else, but it was also like one distracting thought succeeding another. It was the opposite of how he saw the Gurdjieff Work, which helps take us away from the state of mind where we are constantly distracted.

O had tried to divert her attention to something insignificant, and noticed that it drew her attention to the miraculous nature of the insignificant. In a way, it was a different kind of fascination, rather than divided attention, a higher awareness rather than just treating the insignificant as triviality.

When GC realised that he had been getting involved with thinking that was like a soap opera, he would say to himself. for example, Tree!, and his attention would be diverted outwards to the trees, and the thinking would stop. When you actually had to think about something, then obviously you did not need to divert your attention, but the amount of time during the day that we thought about things that needed thinking about was very small, and at other times we were just dreaming.

GC said he could not understand how L could say that that challenge had nothing to do with Gurdjieff. L said that normally we could do a direct link to something Gurdjieff had written in Beelzebub's Tales, or something we had been discussing during that Meeting about Gurdjieff, but in this case by the last minute of the 10 minutes allocated to deciding a challenge, we had still not come up with one. Then D remembered this thing he had read somewhere, but did not remember where. From that point of view, L was not sure there was a direct link with Gurdjieff. N said he thought it was very much to do with self-remembering and the Gurdjieff Work.

Responding to GC, L said that rather than being aware of having a set of thoughts, and then looking at something else and having a different set of thoughts, GC's idea was to put a stop to those thoughts, which was different from what D had suggested. GC said that everybody had personalised the challenge.

Following the responses to the contributions, the reading continued from Chapter 25 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

“As for the information which passed from generation to generation through the ordinary mass of beings of that planet, it has either completely disappeared, having been soon forgotten, or there remains of it, as our dear Mullah Nassr Eddin expresses it, only the ‘tail-and-mane-and-food-for-Scheherazade.’ 

...How the contemporary learned beings of the planet Earth concoct their hotchpotch ... is very well defined in one of the wise sentences of our dear Mullah Nassr Eddin, which consists of the following words: "A flea exists in the World just for one thing— that when it sneezes, that deluge should occur with the description of which our learned beings love so much to busy themselves."

L said that if you had a body of knowledge which you wanted to transmit for, maybe, hundreds of thousands of years in the future, it was almost impossible, because as soon as you started talking about it, it started to diverge. L said that the bit about the flea sneezing was similar to the question of how many angels can dance on the end of a needle. T said that the flea was the tiniest thing, yet the sneeze was a deluge. L said that something inconsequential might lead to a whole science. O said that James Joyce was a case in point - he wrote his book, and he said that all the academics read his book over and over to interpret it.

'To me, a trifling particle of the whole of the GREAT WHOLE, it was commanded from Above to be coated with the planetary body of a three-centered being of this planet and to assist all other such beings arising and existing upon it to free themselves from the consequences of the properties of that organ which, for great and important reasons, was actualized in the presences of their ancestors.

'All the sacred Individuals here before me ... have always endeavored while striving for the same aim to accomplish the task laid upon them through one or other of those three sacred ways for self-perfecting, foreordained by OUR ENDLESS CREATOR HIMSELF , namely, through the sacred ways based on the being-impulses called “Faith,” “Hope,” and “Love.”'

O asked why it was so important to assist all other beings. "R" said it was because the world was in a perilous state. L said that this assertion was in quotation marks, so it was one of the characters saying it. O asked why Gurdjieff was implying that there was a Creator in the first place. L said he thought Gurdjieff was playing off those who set themselves up as teachers against those who follow teachers too blindly.

Someone Special

L had noticed quite often when he was being judgemental, and to then stand on one leg was a good way to wake up, because it forced him to use the physical aspect of his being.

Once a day, to notice when you are making a judgement, and then to stop, and not make that judgement. Then stand on one leg briefly, and observe anything happening in your body or emotions.

He had found after a while that he was being less judgemental, and certainly more aware of that aspect of his character. Being judgemental was usually an automatic behaviour, so in that aspect he was being a little less automatic but in other areas he noticed that he was more automatic, because it was possible that waking up does not progress very far. As regards to noticing how he felt in his body as a consequence, he had not noticed any direct correlation between a part of the body and his being judgemental.

N spent his life using his mind, most of the time; in his profession people did. So when he did this CHALLENGE, sometimes he would notice when he was making judgements, sometimes he wouldn't notice it at all. The judgements came at all different types of levels. There were judgements where he was comparing things and making an assessment in his own mind about a situation. There were judgements where he might be morally outraged by something. The more he did the challenge, the more passive his mind became - there was a sort of process which pulled him away from trying to get involved, and he found that he wouldn’t make so many judgements.

T had been making judgements all the time, and it had been shocking. She had mistaken the challenge, because every time she made a judgement, then she became aware of it, and she stood on one leg, but the challenge was to refrain from making a judgement, and the judgements happened in microseconds, and she could not get in between the judgement and the refraining. She noticed that she had been most furious, irritated and judgemental towards people who were doing things that to her were completely off the scale. There was no way that she could do such an action, or say that thing, or be like that. So it had actually been projecting all her own ethics and morals onto the other world of people and places. It had been a wake-up call about how much work there was to do, and how much the mind was in charge and hard-wired.

Further contributions and responses to these contributions were made, but nothing more pertained to contributions relevant to the challenge. The reading continued from Chapter 25 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

... that by the All Most Gracious Command of Our OMNI-LOVING COMMON FATHER ENDLESSNESS, our Cosmic Highest Most Very Saintly Individuals sometimes actualize within the presence of some terrestrial three-brained being, a ‘definitized’ conception of a sacred Individual ...

Ashiata Shiemash had his conception in the planetary body of a boy of a poor family descended from what is called the ‘ Sumerian Race,’ in a small place then called ‘Pispascana’ situated not far from Babylon .

T said that this was the stuff of religion, that someone was special and it irritated her greatly. N said that the mind immediately gets into operation. Take for example 'The Sumerian race ... Babylon'. Who were we talking about here? We looked for biblical things because that was a culture we had come about from. We had all been indoctrinated at some level in the old testament and the new testament. T said that the assumption of something above that was energising something below had led to so much trouble. There was the idea that there was this divine holiness out there, and it stopped us experiencing our own divine holiness.

Three Mind Problem

N said that remembering to do the CHALLENGE once a day, everyday, was difficult, but he remembered one or two scenarios where he had wanted to do something, like maybe eat something he shouldn't, and then stopped himself from doing so.

Once a day, become aware that you are about to do something for which you will feel remorse, and therefore refrain from doing it.

Sometimes he had remembered the challenge, but nevertheless gone ahead with eating the thing. He had had a few Magnums that week, because it had been so hot, and he thought, I really shouldn't do that, because it's not doing me any good to eat this stuff, but also there was a part of him which said To hell with it! Enjoy it! You only live once! So he went through that process, and didn't feel a great deal of shame or remorse about it afterwards. He did not think that any events that had occurred during the past month were ones that would cause him any real sense of remorse.

L said remorse might be like a human sense we were gifted with, which can help guide us. If we knew we were going to feel remorse, it was very often the wrong thing to do, but sometimes it was programmed by society that we should feel remorse. If we arrived at work late, maybe that was a job we shouldn't be doing anyway, which we had sold our soul for. So there was the matter of remorse that was programmed by society, which meant it was not always a reliable guide. He had had the instance of it several times with eating. Sometimes he would not eat something which would have been bad for him, but generally he had eaten things, as N had described eating things, and it was much easier to read the ingredients after eating them - 90% sugar! It was best to read them first!

Responding to L, RM said he got confused very often about whether he felt remorseful because of social conditioning, or was it a genuine thing that he should or shouldn't have done? If he was very religious and went to church regularly, he would have all sorts of things that he should or shouldn't do, and which were good or bad. If he belonged to ISIS, he would have a very different view of what he would be guilty about or not - he could kill people quite happily and have no remorse at all, if they were against his particular religion. So where did his remorse have any validity? Where did it come from? GC said it was conditioning by society. If you looked at a young child, did they feel remorseful if they did anything wrong? Of course not! They had not yet been not told they needed to be remorseful or guilty. N remembered saying something judgemental years ago, which he later on regretted, and felt a lot of remorse about for a long time afterwards. He did not think his reaction had been socially conditioned. It was a personal thing, inherent in terms of conscience and consciousness, where underneath it all, there was some Wisdom about human relationships. There was a part of him which did recognise these things, and there was a part of him that had been very judgemental in that situation.

Further contributions and responses to these contributions were made but nothing more pertained to contributions relevant to the challenge. Following the responses to the contributions, the reading continued from Chapter 24 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

... Man also is therefore only a consequence of some preceding cause and in his turn must, as a result, be a cause of certain consequences.

... whatever maleficent means had been prepared by those learned beings assembled there from almost the whole planet for the gradual transformation of the Reason of their descendants into a veritable mill of nonsense, it would not have been, in the objective sense, totally calamitous; but the whole objective terror is concealed in the fact that there later resulted from these teachings a great evil, not only for their descendants alone, but maybe even for everything existing.

D asked what was this great evil? J said it was, perhaps, the result you hadn't anticipated, and then you looked back retrospectively and said it was all a little bit wrong because of the result, rather than because the process had been so wrong. T said she thought that the evil was concretised religion telling people what to do. GC asked, what about Gurdjieff telling people what to do? S thought it was about the myths that carried through the generations, that sometimes we did not even know we believed.

... The remnants, that is to say, of those holy ‘consciously-suffering-labors’ which he intentionally actualized for the purpose of creating, just for three-centered beings, such special external conditions of ordinary being-existence in which alone the maleficent consequences of the properties of the organ Kundabuffer could gradually disappear from their presences, so that in their place there could be gradually acquired those properties proper to the presence of every kind of three-brained being, whose whole presence is an exact similitude of everything in the Universe.

The Three Body Problem
has not been solved  
Source: Imgur

GC said he had understood the last sentence of this paragraph. T said it was one sentence. L said the final phrase suggested as above so below, and that we were in some ways similar to the whole universe. S said there were three centres, and they did not co-ordinate, they did not agree. Knowing yourself truly was about knowing the different centres, and attaining those three characters. T asked if it was saying that the universe was a three-brained being.

Swings and Roundabouts

After a while, L had realised that the CHALLENGE was making him aware of the issue of choosing emptiness. The mind does not like emptiness, and accepting it takes effort. He had experimented with letting the mind be empty.

Once a day, if you have a situation where you are weighing up whether to do one thing or another, where one may be good and another bad, adopt a neutral position - make no decision and see if it is possible to hold the uncertainty and not be bothered by it, keeping your equilibrium even though you are not sure.

It was different from mindfulness or mindlessness, and took active intent to accomplish. As far as it related to art, it meant letting nature be how it is, and painting it, or letting music come into your mind and writing it down, or - if you were a writer - letting the characters in your novel come alive, and observing what they did rather than controlling them and making them do this or that.

N said that he did not tend to think in terms of good and bad, and he quite often would just do something. There were not many situations where he found that he thought that there was a divide between good and bad which he had to hold together in his consciousness at the same time, and then try and not be influenced, one way or another, by it. Decision making usually came more into his work life. He did find in his legal work, there were often situations where he was weighing things up, trying to see which course of action would be better for a client. Those were the times when he was really looking at things of this nature, and trying to get a kind of equilibrium.

For T, the experience of being in the position of going one way or the other about a decision, was like going through camouflage. She did not know where this decision was, because the continuously creative way she made decisions this way or that as she went through the day, she experienced was automatically creative and was unaware of the process of reaching them. To try and pause and stop and experience, was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. To actually not do what she had decided to do before the event she had found to be very difficult  and only  achieved it once. On this occasion she had managed to consciously and not automatically initiate a written communication but then not send it. Sending it would have been an habitual automatic behaviour and prolong an unhelpful dynamic between her and another person. 'Not sending' was 'holding the uncertainty' but it continued to provoke a sense of unease, different from the usual unease.

Justitia  
Source: Wikipedia

L thought this challenge was perfectly suited to N in the context of his work, because a lawyer is employed by one side, where two sides have a differing opinion on what should happen and what should be done. Presumably there must be cases where either side might come to somebody like N, and the lawyer would serve whichever client came, so in that sense a lawyer might be dispassionate about the outcome, but do their best to serve one side or the other. The famous statue of justice, blindfolded but holding scales, was a perfect description of what this challenge was about: to consider either possibility of decision, but be dispassionate about it. Of course in law a decision is eventually made, and somebody has to make a judgement. Actively living with the emptiness for a while of not making a decision is hard. Even the judge will wait for a while before deciding. It did strike L as being embodied in our legal system

Further contributions and responses to these contributions were made but nothing more pertained to contributions relevant to the challenge. This appears to reflect several difficulties; deciding on a task and remembering this through the month, keeping with the momentum achieved in the meeting and staying with the task over time through to the point of individual experience of the task, one person's distraction from the task leading to responses that create further distractions to the first distraction which all serve to blur the original task.

After this the reading continued from Chapter 24 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

The spirit on the right constantly strives to make the man refrain from doing those actions which are in the domain of the opposite spirit, and, perforce, more of those in his own domain.

And the spirit on the left does the same, but vice versa.

In this strange teaching it was further said that these two ‘spirit-rivals’ are always combating each other, and that each strives with might and main that the man should do more of those actions which are in his domain.

T said the passage was suggesting the different sides have lives of their own. They were controlling the person. It was not thoughts from inside out, it was beings from outside in. L said that each was trying to stop the individual doing the things promoted by the other, so what was considered good? There must be some actions which are hard to determine. If he were an artist painting a tree, he did not see how that fitted into a context of good or bad, he would just be giving testimony of what the world was like. J said it was not good or bad. There was a decision with each colour put on the paper, with each brush stroke, it was the evaluative part which was slightly the red herring, but the question would be, in this context, whether to consider the brushstroke very carefully, or else to paint with a flow. There was something to be said for each in its own context.

In the charge of the spirits standing on duty on the right is just that place called Paradise.

It is a place of indescribable beauty and splendiferousness. In that Paradise are magnificent fruits in abundance and endless quantities of fragrant flowers, and enchanting sounds of cherubic songs and seraphic music constantly echo in the air...

In that Hell sounds constantly echo of fearful ‘cacophony’ and infuriated offensive ‘abuse.’

Everywhere there are instruments of every conceivable torture...

L thought his description of Hell was something that nobody would want. As for Heaven, he was not sure everybody would want that indefinitely. T said she thought Heaven was the lesser evil, if you had to make a choice between Heaven and Hell. K said that if you were predisposed to evil, and you got put into Heaven by mistake, it would be Hell. They were forces and there was a kind of balance. L said it was also this ideology of Heaven and Hell which had caused enormous problems in the world. N said that children who wrote with their left hand were at one time forced to write with their right hand, because this idea of left and right went right through Western culture for a long period. The Latin word sinister means left. A large part of our culture was prejudicial to the left as opposed to the right.

The Tower of Babel

In the process of doing the CHALLENGE, N noticed that he rushed things. He had gone on a meditation weekend, and realised there was lot of stress in his life, and just doing meditation slowed the whole system down.

Once a day, do some activity at half speed, with good, positive feeling.

In terms of consciously slowing things down, he found he could perceive part of the mind wanting to push ahead and do things faster, and it made him stop all that and observe the machine a lot more, in terms of being able to see where his mind was trying to interfere with his body movements as well.

Old Guitarist, by Picasso  
Source: Painting Planet

One of the things he noticed was, in playing the guitar, there were some benefits of slowing down. In terms of doing scales, if he slowed things down and then speeded them up, the result was better, because he was more accurate, and played with more tonality.

When T did the challenge, she was usually moving along at a pace to get somewhere, and slowing that down highlighted what she thought of as a different driver, and the driver before was the head, and the driver when slowing down was the "challenge" driver, a different driver but nevertheless a driver. Slowing down turns off the autopilot, and suddenly the plan that she was heading for would dissolve, the time supposed to be at the planned place with the people she was supposed to meet. The surroundings would suddenly become themselves, and the shapes of the buildings, the colours, become more intense. Her experience of body would change with the change of momentum, and seemed to be more of her senses returning into it and awareness returning of it. Her feet, legs, torso, arms, the senses of sight. It was like a slow motion experience. She would be going along, remember the challenge, and then slow down. Everything slowed. It was like experiencing herself as part of something bigger. She found that when she was intent on doing a practical task, it was difficult to maintain slowness, and she was often in that mode, where she was trying to get things done, to the cost of experiencing being there.

L had found this an active awareness rather than a passive mindless experience, and he had noticed that he tried to engineer situations which caused him to be late, and that made him walk faster, and that was maybe from trying to do too much. He had done the challenge a number of times. Sometimes it would be walking slowly, and that was quite interesting. If he walked slowly, then people who were walking behind tended to overtake him, and he could hear some interesting conversations. He heard a woman's voice explaining how she had been trying to give some tadpoles a high protein diet, but there had been a difficulty in finding worms. He noticed, also walking, an elderly man walking much slower than everybody else, and that made L more aware and he noticed blossom falling from the trees, and that was very nice. He experienced the steam slowly rising from his coffee. Generally it was an enhancement to experience. He had reflected on how nice it would be to experience things like a tree does, which means very slowly. Sometimes the wind would make it move slowly, but a tree might experience each wing beat of an insect going slow.

The other contributions were not about doing the monthly challenge. The responses to contributions, on this occasion, were likewise unrelated, as was discussion following paragraphs read from Beelzebub's Tales.

Big Foot

T felt that for most of the month she had failed miserably, but what came up was the question, what does waking up mean? She knew the English language, but to her, she couldn't grasp what it might mean apart from going from sleep to wake.

At the end of each day, ask yourself if you woke up during the day, and if so, how many times, and what woke you.

 
Source: Imgur

She thought, maybe, that she must sleep all the time in terms of any other waking up. On some occasions she remembered enough to write it down in the evening the points in the day when something jogged her or jarred her out of another way of being. Now she could not really understand her notes, but read some of them out.

• A flood where she worked and the image of "seven maids with seven mops" in The Walrus and The Carpenter by Lewis Carroll
• When the tube train lurched
• Somebody screaming and shouting

The difficulty L had experienced with this CHALLENGE was the gap between the times when he noticed he was awake during the day, and reviewing them in the evening, to review them. Also there wasn't anything he was meant to do when he realised he was awake during the day, except to remember it later in the evening, and then if he did not remember it in the evening, that link was gone. What he had found useful was something additional K had mentioned, the idea that when he did wake up during the day, to try to extend that moment, to slow that moment of time down. It was like doing a stretch, and then stretching a little bit more. So when he became awake he would lean into it to let it last a little longer. He had found this had worked for him a few times making that moment of wakefulness a bit stronger.

N had done the CHALLENGE very often. He had tried to associate, in his mind, going to his bedroom at night with spending some time reviewing the day, and had found there were certain moments in his day which he could see were more conscious, more aware, than others. He also had experiences of seeing things in a different way. He had started a new job in a new area of London, and had realised he did not fully observe. Seeing a street he was on, he might not register certain buildings. So he went through a conscious process of recognising the buildings, and looking down the street and seeing things. As a result, if he reviewed his day, he had found that if he had spent some time in active seeing and active listening, then the day had been much more meaningful.

Watch on YouTube

Responding to L, GC said it was a lot easier to realise you were asleep than to prolong the awake moment, because when you tend to realise, it tends to dissipate. That was the problem. It was like watching your breath, which you might think was easy, but what you were actually doing was regulating your breathing. To actually just watch your breath as it manifests itself throughout the day, is extremely difficult to do without changing your breath, and yet people just brushed over it.

The reading continued from Chapter 24 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

The notice announced that the reporter had taken as the theme of his report the ‘Instability-of-Human-Reason.’

Thereupon, this terrestrial friend of mine first expatiated on the kind of structure which, in his opinion, the human ‘head-brain’ has, ... and how only after definite what is called ‘agreement’ between all the brains are the total results impressed on this head-brain.

He spoke calmly at first, but the longer he spoke, the more agitated he became, until his voice rose to a shout, and shouting he began to criticize the Reason in man.

And at the same time, he mercilessly criticized his own Reason.

Still continuing to shout, he very logically and convincingly demonstrated the instability and fickleness of man’s Reason, and showed, in detail, how easy it is to prove and convince this Reason of anything you like.

GC asked if somebody could explain in different words the fickleness of man’s Reason. N said that, as a lawyer, you can argue any case you want, anyway you want, to prove anything. If you want to find reasons, you can go and find authorities, you can go and find whatever you want to argue. So he would say to a client, let's look at the positive side of things, what are the arguments in your favour and what's against. So we could use reason and logic whatever way you want it, it had nothing to do with truth.

... Further he said:

‘To every man, and also of course to me, it’s quite easy to prove anything; all that is necessary to know is which shocks and which associations to arouse in the other human brains while one or other “truth” is being proved. It is very easily possible even to prove to man that our whole World and of course the people in it, are nothing but an illusion, and that the authenticity and reality of the World are only a “corn” and moreover the corn growing on the big toe of our left foot. Besides this corn, absolutely nothing exists in the World; everything only seems, and even then only to “psychopaths-squared.”’

Animation by Terry Gilliam  
Source: Pinterest

L said he very much liked the paragraph about the corn on the left foot. GC asked L what he had got from that. L said it says very powerfully, that everything is illusion. T added, except for the corn, and we considered that the corn was the lowest of the low, literally. GC asked why we considered the corn the lowest of the low. T said this was because it was at the bottom of the foot, nobody takes any notice, it grows and grows and grows until it gets really painful, and then you need an operation. GC said, and then you would take notice. T said, therefore, take notice of the lowest of the low, the only bit that is real. The reality of the world was only a corn, but if you left a corn unattended, then eventually you would be unable even to walk, and would need an operation. GC said it might get better by itself. T said, only if you attended to it. A corn was caused by pressure from an ill-fitting shoe, you would not get a corn if you were going barefoot. But the ill-fitting shoe, of fashion or convention, or protection against rocks, could cause corns. L said that T had made a very good point about the corn and reality. There was one part of our experience of the world which was real, and it was on the edge of people's perception, but the only people who noticed it were the psychopaths. T asked why a psychopath would notice a corn. L said that the mentally ill may be closer to reality, because they were living apart from the mores of society.

Knock! Knock!

On the mornings when N had done the CHALLENGE, it was often on waking from a dream which had propelled him into being more conscious, and sometimes it was quite an emotional dream. There was a part of him which had not wanted to wake up and be there, and then there was a tension, or conflict. As regards the second part, which was about accepting something he could not change, sometimes acceptance took time. The emotional centre took time, sometimes, to adjust to new situations. The mornings he did do it, he felt a greater alertness, attentiveness, generally during the day. It brought him into the world faster, earlier, quicker. He thought there was a part of him that quite liked to be in a dreamy state.

Every morning, at that moment when you wake up and are in between the world of the sleeping dream and the waking dream, ask Am I here? and then observe if it makes any difference during the day, or during the beginning of the day. Also, once during the day, when at the moment where you have woken up to the fact that you were asleep, ask Am I here? and then think of something you would rather not be the case but cannot change, and accept it, rather than have strong feelings about it.

He liked dreamy things, the music of Debussy, almost like being at that sensuous level, and living at that level. So there was a part of him that had to sometimes wake up and be more realistic, and less sentimental, maybe, about things. And then in the course of the day, when he had moments of more clarity, more wakefulness, he thought it was certainly better on those days on which he had had more of an experience in the morning. So as an early morning process he thought it had worked for him.

K said that recently he had been walking with a friend, who did not know anything about Gurdjieff, and he found himself doing the challenge. He stopped walking for a bit, being immersed in it, and she asked What's going on? He said that these Gurdjieff Meetings which he went to, had a challenge to do last week, and funnily enough when he had suggested the challenge at the Meeting in that moment, he found himself in what Gurdjieff described as being-astonishment, which was a complete lack of humility and that was a real kick-starter for him, during the meeting about humility.

 
Dream Door 1
Jeremy Kemeni 2014

When L woke up in the morning from a dream, he had not always had the presence of mind to remember - Ah, this is the Gurdjieff CHALLENGE - I'm going to try and stay in the place between the sleeping dream and the waking dream - but he had had the presence of mind several times, and on those occasions it had felt like a period of greater wakefulness before he was overwhelmed by his adapted personality to the world he lived in. He thought that was helpful, and thanked K for his suggestion. He had also recalled having read of a similar idea. Just when going to sleep but before the onset of dreaming, there was an opportunity to go to another place, a kind of doorway. He did not know who had written about that, but there was a similar situation, when going from the waking dream to the sleeping dream - a point of inflection in between. He had tried to latch hold of that once or twice, too. During the day, his trigger was more when he noticed himself worrying about things, rather than when he became awake. He would then ask Am I here? - this was RM's idea - and then he would accept that he could respond to things, but not change people, and nor should he want to. He could only try to change himself.

Ever since he had come across this idea as an exercise, RM had been doing it every morning. As soon as he could he asked himself, Am I here? He no longer needed to ask Am I here? because he would get to the point where he would say, I wasn't here, was I? It was a strange thing. It was having effect throughout his life now. There was a sense of presence about things. He had a sense that this was where the real work was done. There was a depth of understanding growing all the time.

When T remembered to say Am I here?, she could not locate what the word I related to. There was one moment which was quite soon after the last Meeting, so the challenge was fresh in her mind. She had gone to the cafe before work and was quite anxious because of stuff going on at work, and she asked herself that question, Am I here?, in this strange situation, and she just felt terror, thinking about the whole environment and herself. She felt as if she had no control over her situation, and she was there and then quickly gathered herself not to be there, and to carry on in the modus operandi of who she thought she was during the working day. She had found it a disturbing challenge, but deep and necessary.

Responding to T, D said the "I" had been aware of all she described, it was watching everything that was going on. Who was watching? That was the authentic I, the one that was observing her efforts to locate it, this terror, thinking about work. He did not think it was the situation itself, it was how you thought about the situation, how you reacted to the situation. The situation was neutral. T said that when she had awareness of 'the observer', which was actually quite a nice state, she did not want to be detached, but this state was absent in those moments that she had described; in those moments she was in the situation, totally immersed.

The reading continued from Chapter 24 of Beelzebub's Tales.

With acknowledgements to Harold Good
this Watch on YouTube

The learned beings ... used often to meet together and of course to discuss ... questions which were either immeasurably beyond their comprehension, or about which they could never elucidate anything useful whatsoever, either for themselves or for ordinary beings there.

The question which chanced to become the-burning-question-of-the-day so vitally touched the whole being of every one of them, that they even ‘climbed down’ from their what are called ‘pedestals’ and began discussing it not only with the learned like themselves, but also here, there and everywhere with anyone they chanced to come across.

The consequence was that an interest in this question gradually spread among all the ordinary three-brained beings then existing in Babylon, and by about the time we reached this city it had become the question-of-the-day for all the beings there.

K said that in order for something to be real, it had to be validated by consensus. That burning question spread because a consensus to discuss it had been arrived at. What J had found interesting, was that there was the initial, crucial, daily assumption of the Persian King, like for instance Alexander the Great, who was taught by Aristotle. The learning process was wonderful, learning all about humanity, and then he went off, and built his Empire, destroying beings like himself. So was Gurdjieff saying there that what starts off as a very constructive, thinking process has a tendency to get perverted in time? RM said that the most useful thing was the question itself. It became un-useful when you had the answer. While you had a quest, which was an open question, that was a very healthy coming together. The minute somebody said I know the answer, and everybody had to follow them, then it actually got completely skewed. Answers were not very helpful. It was questions which were. "R" said that questions bring energy. RM said that answers block things.